In this post i am going to talk about Focus on the ‘now’ and sometimes the future (as the long term future is important). whilst also pointing out that it is important to understand the reality of what is around you. Some things can be changed and some cannot but what you can change is yourself. When someone is full of ego or defending their self image they become so stubborn or delusional and end up thinking with specific mindsets.
Have you met someone who always talks about the past? How things could be different, how they could of done things differently? Why there life would be perfect if they just did this or that, thing is i know we all have done things we wish we could of done better but why will bringing the past into the now help? What we have left or what we have now is what we have. What we had or what chance we had is not in the ‘have’ so should not be part of the ‘have’ mindset.
If it is not part of the ‘i have this’ mindset then it might be part of the ‘i want to change it’. The i want to change it mindset is good but wanting something is not as simple as just wanting it, you need to know how to get what you want correctly and precisely i.e Take action. The point to make here is that if something has happened it has happened regardless of whether we think we still have the chance to change it or not. IF we cannot change something now then focus on what can be changed, which is you. In the Now you can change your life and the now that flows around you, if that is the only thing you can change then focus on that right this minute.
Have you met someone who lives in the future? They are not looking forward to a specific day, then when the certain day or event comes they try to skip it or avoid it. Instead take it on, one can only be less scared of something by doing it. This doesn’t mean go bungee jumping if you have a phobia of heights (as i do) as this problem cannot always be address so easily. Positive thoughts of the future are good but always live in the now so that future events and past events do not affect your thought, emotions nor your way of living. Thinking or worrying too much is almost like a waste of time, complaining or whining how something could be different unfortunately doesn’t help either, its a call for attention. I know many of us had a bad childhood but this is not my point. Only focus now on what you can change not on something you cannot change the outcome for which lies in the past. You can change you future but do not let the future scare you nor let it worry you, let it come to you, embrace it.
Life is a challenge. Do not use your time to worry or allow something in the past to get under your skin.
Have you ever met someone who is filled with logic, or someone who is filled with emotion? When you meet someone who is just filled with emotion they cannot think logically and this person then thinks they are correct based only on the way they feel, it then comes down to ego and who is right and wrong, the person feels a certain way and the person feels justified to do say or do anything simply because they feel this feeling.
On the other side have you met someone who is so logical that they cannot see other people being hurt? Such a person may use their logic to justify they are correct with their own belief system i.e i believe it is fine to do this because of that. Such reason may seem normal to the person being logical but being too logical leads to one seeing everything but the others feelings.
The trick is not to think linearly like the past is the ‘now’ or the ‘future’ is the now. Live in the now but dont allow the past or future to become the now. Do not be overcome by logic 100% or emotion 100%, instead balance them but more importantly know your in control of what you do and how you do it. Think too emotionally and you will eat that chocolate and drink another bottle of wine without logic of why its wrong for you (especially if you are really ill). Think too logically and you will ignore feelings of a person and think that your reason is everyone’s reason.
Use both Logic and Emotion for your real answers, balance it and use both for direction. Differentiate between past, now and future so that you are able to live a real life and not one in a bubble where everything becomes an illusion. Living in the now allows you to be based on the ‘day’ that is today rather another day that is no longer important.
When a scary future date appears once you have actually done it you will probably realize it wasn’t even that bad, when you look back at the past smile and realize it has passed, know that what you did then cannot be compared to now and who you are today. Change yourself today, be the ‘now’ rather than the tomorrow or the yesterday. Taking day by day, going with the flow, having fun and being focused on the day at hand helps one to be less focused on things that are less important. Don’t get all the words mixed up, separate them so you can live a real life, one based on the Now.
So remember don’t live in a fictitious future or past you created where you make up scenarios, it does no good to worry or get mixed up in something that is not actually reality. Don’t dwell so much on the past or the future, make balanced thoughts rather than basing them off 100% logic or emotion only.
Also remember that ‘long term success’ is also based on focusing on day by day, because each day then becomes its own day with hard work and with real improvement. When you see that big doughnut in the shop and you wish to lose weight thinking with the mindset each day ‘i am trying to lose weight and with time i will be 12 stone’ . Not being swayed by the feeling the doughnut gives you is one thing someone can do each day to actually lose weight, take each day by day, focus on each day by day. This action eventually becomes part of the sub conscious, we evolve to what we tell ourselves and what the sub conscious takes in.
More importantly take it day by day and enjoy each day of your life. Don’t live in the past or the future and use logic and emotion together to make life’s decisions.