What we do is really what makes us who we are as a person but it also determines how far we go to gain it too. The ones who have courage to pursue their dreams will only be repaid with the effort they have put into going for that dream, if we allow ourselves to cling to negative thoughts or about certain things or situations that give us that response in our head “i cant do this” then we will let fear consume us and stop of from pursuing a life of unlimited possibility. We should all come out of that comfort zone, stand back and tell our self “yes I can do it”. Your chances of reaching out for your dreams are being controlled by your fear only because you allow it.
If we just go and do our fear we will receive a big smile our faces, you will tell yourself after “wow i just did that, it was so easy and so not scary”. Keep in mind if we do beat our fear of something that same fear will feel less scary the next time. Through positive thoughts we can make things happen even in the hardest/scariest moments, being positive is the first step to overcoming fear as negative thoughts will only hold us back. I have a great idea too: tell your friend you will do something scary if he or she buys you a drink or a hot chocolate, why not?
Fear could be seen as one big negative feeling but i like to see it as an emotion we have been blessed with, we should embrace and feel it, fear is there to tell us when we do not like something or feel uneasy of doing it or being around it. What we don’t realize is that part of evolution in mindset is to do these things so that we get used to them, we change our mindset to think less of it as a threat and make it more a fun thing to do. When we do fearful things sometimes the first time we lose, sometimes we screw up; but doesn’t it take all those losses first to gain all those wins? Getting me? The strongest people made many mistake before reaching the top, the height, or the pinnacle of success. A lot of our thought is put on our fears during the day such as “i will take the long route instead” or “im going to go by bus and not by tram even though the tram is faster”. Thing is we actually hold ourselves back from doing the very few things that improve us as people.
Here are some things i once found scary in my life, i admit:
- Talking in front of a class or group of many people.
- Flying by plane.
- Walking up to someone I find attractive and talking to them.
- Fear of height or high places. (example: Eiffel Tower).
The above are all true for me, and probably for many people. I have no problem being truthful but what i do know is that being honest I jump at the chance to talk in front of a class or large group of people, i’d love to have that impact on people. However fear does holds me back sometimes, but after a lot of personal growth and understanding i realize one thing that helps me to be less afraid of it, that is: what people think of you does not matter even if you screw up. Sometimes going straight into the deep end is better. It is almost like walking step by step into a ‘cold’ swimming pool when we could just have a cold shower then jump in the deep end ;)We as people always wish to have a safe ride or a comfortable life, one that always feels 100% secure. Not feeling that fear and doing itanyway is the one thing that stops us from opening that extra door that leads us on to new things such as friends, experiences or possibly even a new job. One big thing we actually get from overcoming a single fear is confidence and while this confidence is temporary it will give you a buzz for a long time, i recently did something scary, i simply walked past a big group of intimidating people (doesn’t sound like much i know) but this was really uncomfortable for me but as i just walked past I said hi, then I got around the corner and a big smile lit up on my face. Not only did i do something easy (which seemed difficult) i said hi to some strangers, they said hi back. If for example these people had been horrible to me and not said hi or simply ignored and laughed should i let it go on and bother my life after? Definitely no. Should i analyze or make identity meaning of it, of course not. Will you see these people again on the streets? Probably not and if you did they will probably see you 4 years later when they no longer remember you!Within time i kept adding new challenges and goals (especially fearful ones), I now practice saying hi to strangers at the bus stop, train stop etc. Eventually i was actually walking by people looking at them sometimes and smiling. I kept doing this until it was literally part of me, i could be happy and walk up to someone and simply have a conversation with them, it no longer bothers me. Tell yourself that this fear can be overcome through sheer will power and that the gain from it is fantastic. Do you know that feeling fear is just like feeling alive? What i mean is that fear doesn’t kill us, it just thrills us. Whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.
“Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear.”
If your courage is strong and important you will look forward to enjoying fear regardless of what is in your path, if your goal is more important than what is in front of it you will simply walk through the darkness or the fire that sits in front of you. The fear will not harm you, it till only add to your growth, personality and the confidence you already have. Do not give power to your fear but rather give the power to yourself, feel it and do it anyway. Rid those little feelings that stop you from getting what you want. The only person that holds us back is our self.
Please share your stories, but only if you are fearless of doing so 🙂 Thanks for reading.